Written by Purva Brown of The Classical Unschooler
Imagine if you will this scene: three children, heads buried deep in their Kindles, sprawled in the middle of the living room floor. They discuss strategies, show each other their progress, jump from game to game. Meanwhile, the parents busily work in the same room.
This was our life for the last two weeks.
We were in the midst of getting our house ready to sell. While the children played for hours, we painted for hours. A win-win for everyone.
In our home, we do not shun technology. We love it.
In fact, technology rules in our homeschool! Let me explain exactly why we embrace video games and other screens:
The benefits of video games and technology for kids
1. They give children the ability to fail and try again.
I have a daughter who did not speak her first sentence until the age of four. Part of the reason for her late speech is her dislike for making mistakes. I have often been at my wit’s end trying to get her to just try to answer – something, anything when it comes to math and other school work. If she isn’t convinced that the answer will be correct, she doesn’t like to try.
Video games, by letting her fail easily and often, free her from the tyranny of perfection. Many times, it takes more than one try to make it past a level. There is always another chance. Video games put failure in its rightful place.
2. They encourage cooperation.
At four, my youngest cannot do much on his own. He watches his older siblings do chores and advanced schoolwork, but he is simply too young to contribute much yet. The only place he is able to “help” in a very real sense of the word is when the children play a video game together.
In Minecraft, for example, I love to hear them cooperate with each other, “give” each other items and build houses together to protect themselves from attack. Their camaraderie is beautiful for a mama to watch.
3. They offer a sense of control.
In a world where children are constantly told what to do, when to do it and how to conduct themselves, I like that my children have a space of their own. Through games they gain a sense of control and self-direction.
Many times, they have to figure out the “rules” and how to win. They strategize, read about it, and work hard. I refuse to take that opportunity away from them.
Our Practical Rules Regarding Technology
While we love and make liberal use of screens, that does not mean we abdicate all parental responsibility. While we see much that is good with the use of technology, we also do not allow ourselves to be ruled by it.
Here are a few of our family’s rules:
1. Screens must be set aside on a regular basis for plain old-fashioned play.
2. No screens during meals.
3. No looking at your screen and walking anywhere – set the screen down and look in front of you.
4. If we find that screens get in the way of children listening to or obeying parental instruction and discipline, they will be taken away.
5. Screens are a luxury and we must treat them as such – children must take responsibility for breaking or mishandling them.
6. Talking to each other requires eye contact.
7. For a while, we had a rule that we would not use any apps or video games until about 1 pm. However, as the children have grown, that rule has been relaxed. They know that they can play whenever they want and this has made them more (not less!) self-directed in picking a time to get their schoolwork done.
Every family is different
Our family has found what works best for us when it comes to screens, and yours should do the same. As in every other aspect of homeschooling, there is no one-size-fits-all answer!
But I hope that sharing our story offers some helpful food-for-thought as you navigate the road toward finding the right amount of screen time, video games, and technology for you and yours.
Does technology rule in your homeschool, too? What are your family’s rules surrounding it?
Jen | Practical, By Default
As a working homeschool mom online programs, apps and games are how we learn at home and on the go. I noticed the same as you. I have a child who frustrates easily when she fails. Games are helping her figure out that is how we learn better than I ever could 🙂
Jen | Practical, By Default’s latest post: Fill Up Your E-Reader This Weekend – For FREE!
Purva Brown
Excellent! So glad you’ve come to the same conclusion!
Purva Brown’s latest post: The Four Tendencies (And How Knowing Them Can Benefit You)
Rachel
I never expected this result and I’m also loving for my 7 yo
Karin
This is an excellent article! It’s always interesting to see how homeschooling changes in general and how it adapts to meet individual family needs. Your last paragraph is very accurate, and thanks for including that. As a former homeschooling parent (11 years of it, all before smart phones) we also found what worked for us. Little online, not too many video games, but we did use things like VHS and DVD (my eldest is 22, so yes, still VHS!). The wisdom lies in knowing your children and what works for them. Where some children learn to cooperate well with minecraft as yours have, some will have strong sibling rivalry with that sort of game. Kudos to you for having excellent ground rules, as well.
Homeschooling was essential for all of my kids for different phases of their lives (one grades 3-9, the other two from K through 7 or 8 because they really wanted a brick and mortar school, every day band and were prepared to work hard to have it), but I think that it can also be excellent through high school (what I thought we’d do).
Purva Brown
We had VHS until only a few years ago. I loved watching some of the older children’s movies on that.
I’m so glad you see how customizable homeschooling can be depending on the family!
Purva Brown’s latest post: The Four Tendencies (And How Knowing Them Can Benefit You)
June
I love all these rules, and I really appreciate the way you talk openly about technology both here and on your own site, Purva. We read so much against technology these days (how damaging it is and how many limits we need to set) that its refreshing to read an article that has a healthy approach to something that is, and will be, such a big part of our kid’s lives. It’s all about balance!
June’s latest post: When Finding Your Homeschool Style Takes Forever
Kathleen Calado
Definitely agreeing with you that technology rules especially if you love to homeschool your kids. I homeschool my kids and their schedule always consist of outside play ofcourse I don’t want them to get too much engross at playing with their smart tablets and sometimes forget what it’s like to be curious. Anyways, thanks for sharing this with us!