When Homeschoolers Change Their Minds

When Homeschoolers Change Their Minds ~ 
Written by Amber O’Neal Johnston from Heritage Mom

My husband and I excitedly jumped in with our preschooler when we began homeschooling. Part of our reason for keeping her home was the opportunity for acceleration; we wanted her to start school earlier than our local school district would allow.

With a stack of read-alouds, a box of colorful math manipulatives, and a zoo membership in hand, we were off to the races.

I had no clue what I was doing, so I spent a lot of time studying early childhood education philosophies online. The more I researched, the more convinced I became that our initial acceleration goal was no longer a wise position. Instead, we decided to put on the brakes and slow down.

That decision didn’t stop our forward movement, but we lingered longer and prioritized expansive, broad learning over going farther, faster.

The more committed we became to meandering, the surer we were that we’d made the right choice. Until it was no longer serving our daughter.

When Homeschoolers Change Their Minds

Last summer, our oldest came to me requesting to begin high school a year sooner than planned. I wasn’t receptive to the idea as I assumed she was trying to keep up with her besties, and I didn’t see that as a valid reason to change anything. But she immediately teared up, which was so unlike her, and I could tell she was in distress.

She proceeded to perfectly articulate the reasons that she felt ready for high school. And to my surprise, it had nothing to do with her friends.

Because of our initial slow schooling vibe, she had always been the oldest in her “grade.” As the years went on, our “move at your own pace” mantra resulted in a quickened pace, making her ready for higher-level learning earlier than I anticipated.

She wanted to be challenged and to feel like the hard work she was putting in would be acknowledged for what it was.

I explained that we could count some of her eighth-grade work toward high school credit, but she found that idea entirely unsatisfying:

“I’ve done everything you’ve ever asked of me and genuinely enjoy learning. I don’t receive letter grades, compete with other students, get awards in assemblies, or anything similar. My motivation has always come from within, and getting the school grade designation that matches the work I’m doing motivates me right now, even if you don’t understand it.”

Who could argue with that? So, I threw out my eighth-grade plans and quickly adjusted, but it was a struggle. I felt like I was reneging on my philosophy of not rushing through school.

My unpreparedness flustered me because I normally research thoroughly and enter the school year very organized. Most of all, I was scared.

By allowing my daughter to start high school sooner, I felt like I was signing up to lose a year with her in our home, and the mere thought of it made me terribly sad. I shared my honest thoughts with a dear friend, and what she said changed everything.

“You don’t want her to remain in the nest simply because you clipped her wings.”

Such wisdom! I don’t ever want to hold my children back. With that in mind, I shook off the yoke of fear, rolled up my sleeves, and planned as beautiful a ninth-grade year as I could, and boy, has it been magnificent.

My daughter was absolutely right. She was ready for the next level in every way. Her lessons have flourished, her social life has blossomed, and she is more confident and self-assured than ever.

Changing my mind hurt, but it was one of the best decisions of our homeschooling journey.

The big picture is now held loosely in my palm as I acknowledge that what is right in a particular season will continue to shift as my kids grow and mature—and, truthfully, as I grow and mature.

As homeschoolers, we chart a course, navigate the seas, and do our best to keep the ship sailing toward shore. But sometimes, there’s an island so beautiful that we must stop and visit. At other times, we drop anchor to rest or recover from an unexpected storm.

And then again, there are moments when we realize that we misread the compass or are headed to the wrong port. As captains of our family’s homeschooling journey, we have the privilege of changing our minds, especially when the health of our beloved crew is at stake.

Take the wheel and steer confidently, dear parent, knowing that you’re doing your best with the information and tools you have right now. Tomorrow, you may change your mind, and new adventures await you at every turn.

What’s Your Homeschool Mom Personality? Take Jamie’s quiz now and receive a free personality report to help you organize your homeschool based on what your personality type needs most!