Written by Shawna Wingert of Not the Former Things
When I was a girl, I used to have a little cupboard, all to myself, in my grandmother’s dining room.
I called it my “Teacher Closet.”
My third grade teacher had something similar in our classroom and she called it, you guessed it, her “Teacher Closet.” It was filled with glue bottles, pencils and colorful paper. She kept her grade book in it, along with boxes of chalk and her own books.
I filled mine with almost the same. School supplies, an old reading workbook I found at a yard sale for a quarter, and all the pens my grandma would let me swipe.
It was my pride and joy. It was a nod to what I already knew to be true.
I wanted to be a teacher.
Last month, a good friend of mine called to say that she was pulling her son from school and starting to homeschool again. I was excited to have another mom to hang out with and offered to help if needed.
What she said really struck me.
“I never wanted to be a teacher, Shawna. I have always liked other things. I want to homeschool my son, but honestly, I am not you. I don’t love the idea of teaching.”
The more I thought about our conversation, the more it occurred to me that is true for so many homeschoolers I know. In fact, I would say the majority of homeschooling moms that I am personally friends with, did not start out with a general desire to teach.
Most would say they never thought they would make the decision to teach, much less homeschool, but they took on the responsibility because they knew it was right for their children.
Maybe you can identify?
For The Homeschool Mom Who Never Wanted To Be A Teacher
There are a few things I think are important for us “teacher types” to admit when it comes to homeschooling. They are the same things I want to say to encourage those of you who never had any desire to be a teacher yourself.
1. It Really Is OK.
After more than eight years at home, educating my children, I can honestly say that the desire to teach has very little to do with actually helping your children learn.
Just like when they learned to walk or use the big girl potty, helping our children learn has a lot more to do with our being their parent and a lot less to do with any teaching credentials or desire to hoard school supplies in a closet all your own.
2. Try Not To Compare.
Here’s the thing – although most of the actual homeschool moms I know in person did not have a desire to teach, a lot of the ones who blog online did. Some of my closest online friends worked in the school system and now blog about homeschooling.
We do it because, you guessed it, we love to teach. We use our background in ways that make sense for us on our blogs – but that doesn’t mean our homeschools should be compared to yours!
This leads me to my next point…
3. You May Actually Be A Better Homeschooler Because You Never Wanted To Teach.
I am 100% serious here. When I went to school to be a teacher, I learned about a million things that I needed to unlearn when we started homeschooling.
My children had to endure more than a year of me acting like our dining room was an exact replica of the formal classrooms I had just pulled them out of, much to our detriment.
Not being a “teacher type” allows you to do what you do best and already have a ton of experience in – being their mom and helping them learn things.
4. Asking For Help Is Not Failing.
If you are struggling and feel like homeschooling is becoming too much, please don’t be afraid to ask for help! Teachers do it all the time. So should we homeschooling parents.
There is no shame in admitting that you have no idea where to start, or your child’s latest inability to progress in math has you losing sleep. In fact, looking for ways to partner with other moms often has the immediate effect of making you feel a lot less alone.
Asking for help is not failing. I think it’s the secret to truly owning your homeschool experience.
If you never wanted to be a teacher, please know you are not alone. In fact, no matter what it may look like online, I think you may actually be a part of a growing majority of homeschool parents.
Wanting to teach is not the same as wanting to help our children learn.
Did you want to be a teacher before you began homeschooling? If not, how has it been going for you and your children?
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Homeschooling as an introvert: the blessings & challenges
No, I did not want to be a teacher. And I still don’t think of myself as one. We chose this lifestyle because we think it is best for our children and family. I consider myself to be more akin to a guidance counselor. Sure, I show my children how to do a math problem and we have great discussions about the books we are reading, but I don’t teach in the way most people think of teaching. We learn together through all the ups and downs of growing up and life, and we are a closer family than for it.
I LOVE the guidance counselor description! That is what I think I do most days too. Very well said.
Shawna Wingert’s latest post: What Does A Strength Based Learning Plan Look Like?
I feel like I’m an unknown third category – someone who always wanted to be a homeschooling mom. I’ve been fantasizing about homeschooling my kid since back when I was being homeschooled myself. Meanwhile, the idea of teaching a class in an actual school sounds like a nightmare. (I hate dividing attention between lots of people, answering to authority figures, and also just being in a school building.)
I definitely did NOT want to be a teacher and first found myself homeschooling becasue there was not other option in the Central Asian town we were living in. Now I do it because it’s the best fit for 2 of my 3 kids who aren’t wired for tradtional school. I found your comment about in-person homeschooling friends very helpful. That many of your real-life friends were fairly reluctant homeschoolers at first, without an ed background was comforting to me. As well as the reality than many bloggers have some kind of ed background – that helps me put the right lens on and feel a little better about what I’m doing. Thanks!
I agree. There’s something about having all of us, no matter what our backgrounds, in this together, figuring this homeschool thing out!
Shawna Wingert’s latest post: What Does A Strength Based Learning Plan Look Like?
I’m an education consultant for missionaries, and a lot of them are what we call “reluctant homeschoolers” because they don’t have other options where they live. I definitely don’t believe everyone who homeschools has a delightful homeschool closet, so this article offered a wonderful and needed perspective – thanks!
Thank you for this. I definitely did NOT want to be a teacher. My mom was a teacher and I wanted to be anything but. I didn’t want to homeschool. I would be happy to send my kids off and go do my own thing. Regular school was a stressful disaster for us and we reluctantly concluded homeschooling would fit our kids much better than continuing to force the square peg into the round hole. I’m not sure they think it’s brilliant all the time, but I’ve certainly learned a lot!