3 Reminders To Encourage You During Hardship While Homeschooling ~
Written by Lusi Austin of That Homeschool Life
Things don’t always go as planned in life. Sometimes it’s easy for us homeschoolers to think that the reason for our hardships must be caused by homeschooling. And sometimes it’s not just us thinking that, but it’s other people saying it to us!
I have chronic illness due to auto immune diseases and someone once tried to tell me that it might have happened because I had homeschooled. Some of my kids struggled with dyslexia. I was told that it might have occurred because they were homeschooled.
Older kiddos with mental health challenges. Again…people said it was probably that way due to homeschooling.
NOPE! In fact, because of homeschooling, my kiddos got help with their dyslexia.
Because of homeschooling, they know how to advocate for their mental health needs. And when they struggle? They know where they can come when it’s all a bit too much.
As for autoimmune diseases? They are linked to a mixture of genetic and environmental factors. As far as the research indicates, they were NOT caused by homeschooling *insert eye roll*.
If things are hard right now, I want to remind you of a couple of things.
3 Reminders During Hardship While Homeschooling
1. You are not alone
Got a rogue teen? Or a child who has strayed from your particular faith persuasion? Someone who has struggled with the law and they were homeschooled?
You’re not alone. Homeschooling does not mean your child will have zero challenges! It does not mean there is a guarantee at the end of the homeschooling rainbow waiting for you!
Hopefully as a fully grown adult, your homeschooled kiddo will be equipped to make decisions for themselves. And when they do, they will make mistakes and that is okay! What’s NOT okay is that we look at those kids and blame homeschooling as the reason for their mistakes or struggles.
One of my homeschooling heroes, Sally Clarkson says this about allowing our children to fail:
“Just as a toddler falls when learning to walk, so our children will fall from time to time on the way toward adulthood.” – Different by Sally Clarkson and Nathan Clarkson
2. Don’t buy into the guilt
At the heart of these comments and thoughts is usually someone trying to be helpful. But these kinds of comments are NOT helpful at all! They often send us on a pathway of guilt and shame.
We start thinking all of the “maybe if I hadn’t….” questions and scenarios. And then self-doubt creeps in. But friend, I want to remind you that ALL human beings struggle.
Adults, teens, children alike – we all go through our ups and downs. Kiddos who have been homeschooled are not an exception to this.
3. We don’t blame traditional schooling
When a teen or adult faces hardship, others don’t blame their ‘traditional’ schooling. Why should homeschooling be then blamed when a homeschooled kiddo is in a similar situation?
Healthy adults raise their children and young people to have agency over their lives. With that freedom comes the chance to make some pretty epic mistakes (some more costly than others). And then the consequences of course that also come with those choices.
What I think we need is to talk about how sometimes, our kiddos stretch towards adulthood and do some pretty dramatic things. Sometimes, we feel alone on this path (because not many people talk about this I guess) but the more people I meet, the more people share their own struggles with me.
When we all share our ups and downs, we dispel our sense of loneliness. Let that make our shame disappear too. If you’re going through hardship while homeschooling, you aren’t the only one.
We are in this together, friends.
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